literally

literally.
just some thoughts of late.


*the brain is the most amazing organ in the body. how is it that you can go to sleep and wake up & remember all the wonderful memories (and awful ones) but in an instant, something happens, and you lose your memory. and then there are things that we have blocked out for so long but have a way of coming back into our thoughts? literally amazing.

*we're always saying, "can't wait", "i wish it was tomorrow, the 2nd, etc", "is it 5pm (or whatever time) yet?".. so i'm making myself enjoy the in-the-moment and focusing on the day. as i get older, time seems to go by faster and faster each day.

*dreams that i have been having have literally been scaring me. i woke up in tears from last nights dream. they feel too real and i hope they aren't going to be actually real.

*i'm tired of stressing about money. i'm tired of living literally dollar to dollar. no matter what i do, no matter what "rules" i follow to save money, i never get ahead to actually save or when i do save some, it's gone because another bill needs to get paid, etc.  a little overwhelmed.

*but no matter what crap is going on or the crap that other people pull, i have a lot of be thankful for, period.


just breathe.
and scream sometimes :P

safari fun

gavin's 2nd birthday party

welcome to the terrific twos!

party signs

safari animal cupcakes

peanuts, of course!

bday boy eating his cupcake :)

(just a few pics)

*safari animal themed (mainly elephants, lions, zebras, giraffes and gorillas.. he loves those animals!)

*lots of yummy food

*homemade decor

*family and friends

seriously.. my little baby is two already? it really seems like the other day i was pregnant and getting ready for him to enter this world and now i am getting him ready for pre-school next year. i am so excited for this next adventure, for all the learning, fun, joy, and everything you get with the twos :)





leaving pieces..



it's easier to leave pieces behind than having them weigh you down.

it's time to leave more pieces everywhere i go..

every..

.....

don't forget..

on a journey to love myself first

it's a lot harder than i thought

but i know that i'll be okay if i never find the love of my life

maybe it's just not in the cards this time around.
but in the back of my mind and heart,
i hope that i will find the love of my life.

buckeyes

BUCKEYES recipe

(took the picture a little late. you will have more dough)

ingredients:

3/4 c. peanut butter (creamy)

1 stick butter (softened)

2 c. powdered sugar

1/2 tsp. vanilla extract

1/4 tsp. salt

chocolate chips + about half stick butter (or crisco)

Mix ingredients together using hands or spatula.  (works best to slowly add powdered sugar) the mix will be soft.

Next: form into balls using hands. can be 1/2inch to however big you want them. Place onto lined cookie sheet. Place a toothpick into each ball and refrigerate for 1 hour or until firm.

After the 1 hour mark has passed.. melt chocolate chips and about a half stick butter (or crisco) in saucepan. Make sure it is a smooth, runny type consistency. (if it's hard, add a little water) dip each ball into chocolate to make the buckeye look.

Take out toothpick and smooth out the hole. Put into a container or back on the cookie sheet. Need to stay refrigerated if not eaten right away.

ENJOY :)







straight up funk

straight up fing funk

(and it doesn't get a pretty color either)

this whole week.. i've been in this funk.

and it's not shaking off.

today was a little better. i don't know what in the hell is going on but all i know is, it was so difficult getting out of bed this morning.

reasons why this funk is going on:

*too many decisions to be made about the future

*going back to square 1 with all this vertigo, headaches crap

*can't seem to get ahead financially

*this damn black fuzz ball floating in my vision

*the angels beat the rangers tonight, um really? i'm not even going to start

*definitely missing my brother and sista

*missing friends. i feel so out of the loop

*ran out of doughnuts (kinda joking but seriously, that sucks :P)

ANYWAY. the point is.. i have NO idea why i woke up the other day feeling this funk when i have so much to be grateful for. 

tomorrow is a new day and what does help, is seeing my little man smile, play, be happy, healthy, and being his mama.

love always*